- Always look for the elegance in simplicity.
- A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk I have a work station.
- Is Disney World the only people-trap operated by a mouse?
- Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's inside your ass?
- If you are driving a car at the speed of light and turn on your headlights, what happens?
- The best remedy for greed is generosity.
- Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.
- Life not only begins at forty, it also begins to show.
- How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
- Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Adventure is not outside man, but within, for you cannot cross the sea by simply staring at the water.
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