Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
They divorced over religious differences: he thought he was God and she didn't.
Being over the hill is much better than being under it.
Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
Consciousness is that annoying time between naps.
He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.
A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the computer memory.
Ham and eggs is a mere day's work for a chicken, but a lifetime commitment for a pig.
These are GREAT!!
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