Thursday, June 7, 2007

Messages from God

As I've traveled across our country hitting all 50 states, I've driven past hundreds of churches that proudly displayed inspirational messages on the sign boards on their front lawns. Here are some of my favorites:

• Worry is the darkroom in which negatives are developed.
• Don’t wait for 6 strong men to bring you here.
• Free trip to heaven – details inside.
• Spend thyme in church and become sage.
• Can’t sleep? Don’t count sheep. Talk to the shepherd.
• TGIF: Thank God I’m Forgiven.
• Let’s meet at my house before the game. Bring the kids. – God
• Wal-Mart isn’t the only saving place.
• Wise men still seek Him.
• Come in and pray today. Beat the Xmas rush.
• Unplugged? Come in and get current with God.
• Epiphany: An enterprising Star Trek.
• Make your eternal reservations now – smoking or non-smoking.
• Prayer will put backbone where your wishbone is.
• Forbidden fruits create many jams.
• Is what you’re living for worth dying for?
• For all you do, His blood’s for you.
• Summer advice: Exposure to the Son will prevent burning.
• Sign broken: Come inside for message.
• Seven days without prayer makes one weak.
• Soul food served here.
• God says: My way IS the high way.
• You think it’s hot here? Signed, God
• Learn about our prophet-sharing plan.
• Character is doing what is right when no one is watching.
• Under same management for over 2000 years.
• For fast, fast relief, take 2 tablets.
• God does not vacation from you.
• This church is a gift from God. Assembly required.
• The sign is broken. Come inside for message.
• Try Jesus. If you don’t like Him, the devil will always take you back.
• Body piercing saved our lives.
• Rumor is the only thing that thickens as you spread it.